Is Refusing Cancer Treatment a Selfish Act?

Scripture of the Day:

Malachi 4:2

But unto you that fear my name shall the Sun of righteousness arise with healing in his wings; and ye shall go forth, and grow up as calves of the stall.

This is a hard topic to address. If it were my parent, daughter, aunt, sister...I'd definately want to butt in and give my opinion and be determined to help them make the "right" decision. But I know I can't. It's their decision and no one elses. 

My family did not have the issues that some families have with the decisions of the breast cancer patient. I've said this repeatedly...I went after this very aggressively. I did ask my children how they felt as I was going through this. One of them said that they took their attitude from the one I was showing. Yes they were upset, but since I wasn't falling apart (in public), they wouldn't either. 

But not all breast cancer patients are that decisive and aggressive. I've talked to family members who are very scared for the decisions their loved one is making. 

I found the following question and the answers that were given when asked. I have posted the answer to the question from the Expert. The link to this article is at the bottom of the page and if you go to it, you will find opinions from family members, etc. all over the spectrum. 

I know it's hard for some of you when going through this. This time more than ever is a time to be honest with each other. Maybe your loved one has a perfectly good reason for her/his decisions. Maybe they can't see what you are feeling. This is definately an individual's decision even though it effects the whole family.

Is refusing cancer treatment a selfish act? 

Expert Answers

Kenneth Robbins, M.D., is a senior medical editor of Caring.com. He is board certified in psychiatry and internal medicine, has a master's in public health from the University of Michigan, and is a clinical professor of psychiatry at the University of Wisconsin-Madison. His current clinical practice focuses primarily on geriatrics. He has written and contributed to many articles and is frequently invited to speak on psychiatric topics, such as psychiatry and the law, depression, anxiety, dementia, and suicide risk and prevention.

A decision about whether to accept treatment for cancer is a personal matter, and there is no right or wrong. One must start by carefully weighing the potential risks of the treatment and the potential benefits of the treatment. The person with cancer must ultimately decide which choice is in their overall best interest. "Selfish" has a negative connotation, as though the person with cancer is inappropriately thinking of himself or herself instead of others. In this case one must think of oneself, because it is ultimately the person with cancer who will have to deal with the consequences. One of the factors to consider, however, in addition to the risks and benefits of the potential treatment, is the effect either decision will have on family members and close friends.

If you are the person with cancer and you are seriously considering a choice to refuse treatment, I would encourage you to speak with the people closest to you about it. It is possible they will feel hurt, believing you are choosing to die rather than to spend time with them. It would likely be very helpful to them if they understood how and why you made your decision, or what it is you are wrestling with. It is even possible such a discussion will give you a new perspective that leads you to change your mind. This is a situation where a mental health professional may be invaluable. Such a person could help facilitate a discussion between you and the people you are concerned about, and help you each to understand what the other is experiencing. Hopefully this will lead to you supporting each other through this very challenging time.

Refusing Cancer Treatment

Please take a look at my Prayer page and these people to your prayer list. I believe in the power of prayer and these people could use it. 

If you are making this journey as I am, may God bless you with His healing touch. I know He loves. You

Survivor's Guilt 2

Scripture of the Day:

“We are confident, yes, well pleased rather to be absent from the body and to be present with the Lord.”

1 Corinthians 5:8

This is the 2nd time in a week that I have used this candle. Yesterday a friend and classmate lost his battle with cancer.  I don't want to diminish his loss, but I find myself asking, "why him and not me". I thank God daily for my survival, but why them and not me. So I looked searched again about survivor's guilt and found another article. It describes me to the letter. Although, I have learned to let go, if you are experiencing this with your own cancer, this article may help. There are several links in the article that may be more specific to your needs. You will have to go the article and find those links. The link to this article is at the end of the page. 

Please see the memorial page and these people and their families to your prayer list or chains. If there is anyone you'd like to add please get in touch.

The mental and emotional challenges of surviving cancer

POSTED MARCH 28, 2011, 5:03 PM , UPDATED OCTOBER 29, 2015, 8:48 PM

Ann MacDonald, Contributor, Harvard Health

One of my closest friends is a two-time breast cancer survivor. Terry (as I’ll call her) has been cancer free for eight years—long enough to be considered cured (generally defined as being in remission at least five years). But in no way is she “free” of cancer. Every abnormal blood test, every callback for another mammogram terrifies her so badly she can’t sleep until doctors rule out a recurrence. In some ways, the ongoing psychological and emotional challenges she faces have been worse than the physical treatments she endured.

I thought about Terry when I read the latest government statistics on the number of cancer survivors in this country. Nearly 12 million Americans—4% of the population—are still alive after a cancer diagnosis.

In many respects this is terrific news, and a testament to improved diagnosis and treatment options. But survivorship comes at a psychological price. We discussed these challenges at length in the  Harvard Mental Health Letter, but here’s a quick look at some of the major issues.

“Damocles syndrome.” According to Greek legend, once Damocles realized that a sword was dangling precariously over his head, he could no longer enjoy the banquet spread in front of him. In the same way, the specter of cancer hangs over some cancer survivors. They can become emotionally paralyzed and have a hard time deciding to get married, change jobs, or make other major decisions.

Fear of recurrence. Given cancer’s potential to lay dormant for a while and then spread (metastasize), cancer survivors often experience ongoing fear of recurrence. Follow-up medical visits, unexplained pain, or even sights and sounds they associate with treatment can trigger bouts of anxiety and fear that are as debilitating as those that occurred during cancer treatment.

Survivor guilt. Although happy to be alive, cancer survivors may feel guilty that they survived while fellow patients they became friendly with during treatment or as part of a support group did not. (Early after a diagnosis of cancer, people first ask, “Why me?” When survivors think about those who have died, they tend to ask, “Why not me?”)

Recognizing these challenges, the Institute of Medicine’s Committee on Cancer Survivorship explored ways to help people rebuild their lives after treatment ends. You can read the report, “From Cancer Patient to Cancer Survivor: Lost In Transition,” for free online or buy it from the National Academies Press.

Given that one in three Americans will face a cancer diagnosis at some point in their lives, living with cancer is a topic that touches all of us. If you are a survivor, or know someone who is, these Web sites may be useful.

• American Cancer Society Cancer Survivors Network
• National Coalition for Cancer Survivorship
• National Cancer Institute: Cancer Survivorship Research

If you have suggestions for dealing with the challenges of cancer survivorship, please let us know in the comment section.

The mental and emotional challenges of surviving cancer

If you are making this journey as I am, may God bless you with His healing touch. I know He loves you.

Another Battle is Done

Scripture of the Day:
“Let the one who is thirsty come; and let the one who wishes take the free gift of the water of life.”
– Revelation 22:17

Another has lost her battle with Cancer.Please keep the family of Ellie in your prayers.

If you are making this journey as I am, may God bless you with His healing touch. I know He loves you.

Acupuncture Seems to Help Ease Pain

Scripture of the Day:

John 14:1

            Do not let your hearts be troubled. Trust in God; trust also in me.

I have never used acupuncture in my life, but I know some that swear by it. I was fortunate in that I never had what I call debilitating pain after my mastectomy. I never needed anything stronger than Tylenol or Advil. Anything stronger would make me sick. But I'm probably not the norm. If stronger drugs are hard for you to take, this may be something to consider. The link to this article is at the bottom of the page.

Acupuncture Seems to Help Ease Pain, Nausea, Anxiety After Mastectomy 

TOPIC: Surgery and Complementary and Holistic Therapies 

TAGS: Mastectomy, Preparing for/Undergoing Surgery, and Acupuncture 

A very small study suggests that acupuncture can reduce pain, nausea, and anxiety after mastectomy better than standard care. Women who received acupuncture also were better able to cope with things the first day after surgery than women who received usual care. The study was published in Oncology Nursing Forum on Nov. 30, 2016. Read the abstract of “Assessing the Impact of Acupuncture on Pain, Nausea, Anxiety, and Coping in Women Undergoing a Mastectomy.” In acupuncture, sterile, hair­thin needles are inserted into specific points on the skin, called "acupuncture points," and then gently moved. Researchers propose that acupuncture stimulates the nervous system to release natural painkillers and immune system cells. They then travel to weakened areas of the body and relieve symptoms. In this study, done at Abbott Northwestern Hospital in Minneapolis, Minn., 30 women who were having mastectomy to remove breast cancer were randomly assigned to one of two treatments after surgery: two hospital­based acupuncture sessions, at least 12 hours apart usual care, which included monitoring by hospital staff and medicines to ease pain and/or nausea if a woman said she was experiencing those side effects The researchers asked the women to rate their levels of pain, nausea, anxiety, and ability to cope on a scale of 0 to 10 immediately before and after receiving acupuncture. The researchers visited the women in the usual care group two times after surgery at least 12 hours apart to collect the same information. Compared to women in the usual care group, women who received acupuncture had less pain, nausea, and anxiety, and were better able to cope on the first day after mastectomy surgery. These differences were statistically significant, which means that they were likely because of the difference in care and not just due to chance. "We are always looking for non­pharmacologic pain management options. This study showed that acupuncture in the hospital after mastectomy is not only feasible, it also appears to decrease patients' symptoms of pain, nausea, and anxiety," said Sue Sendelbach, R.N., Ph.D., director of nursing research at Abbott Northwestern Hospital. While the results of this study are promising, the study was very small and done at only one hospital. More research is needed before acupuncture after mastectomy is implemented as the standard of care

Acupuncture May Ease Pain

IF you are making this journey as I am, may God bless you with His healing touch. I know He loves you.