Tired of the Expanders

Scripture of the Day:

Isaiah 66:13

          As a mother comforts her child, I will comfort you.

August 2, 2011

I just realized that I still search for scripture that will help me with breast cancer, but I also have grown to look at all scripture. I think God has grown in my life through this trial. I pay attention to all scriptures on Facebook. Now I need to read my Bible.

Sometimes I forget that I still have these expanders attached tome. And sometimes they feel so blatantly obvious to everyone. In weeks now they’ll go away instead of months. I wonder that will feel like? 

February 26, 2014

God is always there for anything that you are going through, not just breast cancer. I've seen his power through prayer over and over and over again.

I hated those expanders. I wore them for longer than most because my doctors were Navy doctors. My plastic surgeon deployed to Afghanistan and I really liked him so I decided to wait until he got back. I was also very tired of being poked and prodded and operated on. All in all, I think the wait was good. 

If you are making this journey as I am, may God bless you with His healing touch. I know He loves you.

Getting outside Time

Scripture of the Day:

Isaiah 61: 3

          The Spirit of the Lord has anointed me…to appoint unto them that mourn in Zion, to give them beauty for ashes, the oil of Joy of mourning, the garment of praise for the Spirit of heaviness; that they might be called tries of righteousness and they shall build the wastes, they shall raise up the former desolations, and they shall repair the waste cities, the desolations of many generations. 

  Becky gave me this in defining my role in a situation that  

  May or may not have anything to do with breast cancer.

July 30, 2011

My Hayes family stepped up with $166.32 towards my race for the cure. Joyce gave $100.00. I just bawled. The theme this year was pink and it was great.

I had my last treatment last Tuesday. I am so tired. But I’m cross-stitching and working on my prayer blanket. I’m getting my scriptures and prayers on the computer. I need to get this journal there and my website up. David is still shaving his head. He says he’ll keep doing it until mine starts growing back. We’ve been making use of the pool in the morning and evenings. It helps to walk around in it. My legs don’t ache so bad. I am sleeping in socks and gloves after I lather myself with this horse liniment. My hands and heals are peeling raw.

I don’t get out of bed without thinking of cancer. On  Facebook, friends are announcing more and more of it. Will it ever stop?!!

February 21, 2014

My sister gave the scripture above because I kept asking why me. I felt there was a purpose for this disease coming on me. Maybe it was just my way of making something of a hard time, if I thought there was a purpose. I'd gladly go through it again if it saved someone else from having to, like my mother, daughter and all the other women in my family. I know it won't happen that way. The only thing I can really be is a role model for them to look to if they become afflicted with some horrible disease. I may not be out on the streets preaching mammograms nor am I in any lab working towards cures. But in my quiet way, I think I'm making a difference. The number of women that scheduled their mammogram because of me is heart warming. It may not save them but early detection is key.

With the chemo treatments I couldn't be out in the sun. You need to understand that I'm a summer person. It was one of the hardest things I had to do...stay inside! We have an above ground pool and I walk in it almost every day of the summer. David, my husband, got a cover to build over it so that I could go out and sit in the shade while others enjoyed the pool. In the morning, it was shaded and I could go out and get my exercise. 

I remember how raw my hands and feet were. It was so painful. But this liniment was very helpful. It made it easier to get around on my feet the next day, because I didn't miss any work over it.  It's a very thick liniment meant for horses and I loved it.

I don't get up in the morning any more and the first thing I think is about cancer. But after almost 3 years, I still don't go a day without thinking about it. It's not so bad though, now. I have never been so blessed and I will talk to anyone that asks questions. It is still depressing how many people announce on Facebook someone that they know that has been diagnosed with something horrible and need prayers with I gladly give. Oh for a world full of cures. 

If you are making this journey as I am, may God bless you with His healing touch. I know He loves you.  

My Last Chemo Treatment

Scripture or the Day:

Matthew 8:13

          The Jesus said to the Centurion, “Go you way; and as you have believed, so let it be done for you.” And his servant was healed that same hour.

July 22, 2011

The sickness didn’t last as long this time, but other symptoms are still with me. My back hurts to walk very far.

Terri gave me the most beautiful survivor Christmas ornament and the “Class of 71” has stepped up for $225.00 so far.

We’re in Ohio for the Hayes Family Reunion. My last “woohoo” before my last chemo treatment on Tuesday. I know it’s my last, but Lord I wish I didn’t have to. Then I feel guilty because I know there are those who have ti worse than me. I am just so tired of all the side effects and these expanders sitting in my chest m, of no hair. Ok. I’ll count my blessings. That truly will keep me busy for a while.

February 19, 2011

That was a really special family reunion. Everyone wore pink that weekend for me. They kept telling me how beautiful I was being bald. I never got into the wigs and things. I would wear ball caps or nothing. I just couldn't handle the wigs. It's refreshing to know that if I ever have to do the chemo again, that I can live through it and not have to hide behind a wig. 

My niece, Tuesday, started a team in the Race for the Cure in October. My class of 71 donated money to that team in the amount of $225.00. I thought that was just wonderful. I'll probably mention it later, but I collected a lot of money for that race.

I can mention enough how important it is to do your self exams. If you think that it's not so necessary for you because there is no breast cancer in your family, you would be mistaken. There is no history of breast cancer in my family either. The link below will take you to a site that explains how to do the self exam and what to look for. Please bookmark it and use it.

Breast Exam 101

If you are making this journey as I am, may God bless you with His healing touch. I know He loves you.

God doesn't think crying is weak.

Scripture of the Day:

Blessed are those who mourn for they will be comforted. 

Matthew 5:4

There are many reasons to mourn besides death. I mourn for the loss of my breasts. But know that you will be comforted. When I look to Him I always am.

July 13, 2011

My neck and shoulders started swelling. I also have  a blister-like thing on my elbow.  We called Dr. Amy about the swelling. So, I went for an ultrasound yesterday to make sure I didn’t have blood clots. It turns out the swelling is not uncommon either. It’s not so bad today, but the bladder infection is back.

I sent my sister an email. Her husband is a preacher and they are deep in the faith. My question was, “Why is it when I hear certain songs or listen to Michael Smith or Amazing Grace by Celtic Women and just bawl?” Her response was, “That happens because it’s God’s anointed word to you right now, touching you… His way of speaking to your heart…and your way of responding…that’s what true worship is… is Spirit and in Truth,…the Bible says. That’s music’s intended purpose! From the beginning of creation. It’s just us humans that have perverted it at times.” Then I asked “…and the tears? Cleansing? What?” She said, “We are fearfully and wonderful made! Cleansing is necessary for both our body and our soul. Our spirit, too, but that is already done for us through Jesus work on the cross! Ah…Our peace! It’s only the other two parts that need ministered to daily, our body and soul.

If you are making this journey as I am, may God bless you with His healing touch. I know He loves you.

February 14, 2014

I still cry at times when I listen to spiritual or inspirational music. It always gets worse when I get close to the anniversary of the diagnosis and mastectomy...and I am getting close to another anniversary. I should be happy and in the end, I am. But I can't help wishing that this had never happened even after 3 years. I wonder what it will be like after 10 years or 20 years.  Yes, I still have weak moments. It's ok. The following is one is a site about breast cancer awareness and what to look for. It includes a song that I always cry to by Melissa Etheridge, who is also a breast cancer survivor...I Run For Life...and I do.

Know What's Happening

Power in Prayer

Scripture of the Day:

2 Corinthians 2:14

Thanks be to God, who always causes to triumph

*I am in a fixed fight – I have already won.

July 11, 2011

 I’m  having a rough time with chemo again.  I called and talked to Chuck. He prayed for me and the nausea left and never came back. I didn’t have to take any more medicine for that. Susan called to check on me – what a wonderful feeling.  Mark is not a big hugger and gave me one out of the blue yesterday. He doesn’t say no to hugs, just doesn’t volunteer them. I just have remember when I feel bad that I am blessed and loved.

February 12, 2014

You have to believe that there is power in prayer. I know I've said it repeatedly, but it bears repeating over and over. My brother-in-law prayed with me and the nausea left. That sort of thing happened over and over again. When I got diagnosed, everyone that had a prayer chain put me on it. I know that prayers for me went up around the world. I believe with all my heart that the power of prayer saved my life as much as the wonderful doctors I have been blessed to work with. If you need lifting, don't hold it in. Ask for help.

If you are making this journey as I am, may God bless you with His healing touch. I know He loves you.

There are so many kinds of cancers out there that hurt us. It's hard to stick to breast cancer in my blog sometimes. The following is a video that a dying father with cancer made for his daughter. I just wanted to share the strength he had to do this for his little baby.

To His Daughter

I also maintain a second blog about my projects and crafts that keep me entertained and occupied. Gammie's Corner

Keeping Active

Scripture of the Day:

Philippians 1:6

God will bring to a flourishing finish.

*For every setback – God has already lined up a comeback.

July 7, 2011 

I had chemo treatment number 3. I slept pretty well last night. I only woke up once. I did get hot a few times though. Have to go in today to get my shot for the white blood cells.

David and I went kayaking with a tour on Monday in the ocean to see dolphin. We figured the last day before the next treatment, I’d be in good shape. I was. We had a good time. We had 3 guides and they kept checking on me. That was nice. We scared them out of a year’s growth when David accidentally dumped me in the ocean. A young lady lost her visor and David reached his oar to get it and we went over. I could hear the one guy yelling “no! no! no!”. All I was thinking is “He’s really gonna tip us over!”. Once I get out from underneath the kayak, I was fine. My hat amazingly stayed and I had one pair of earrings that should’ve come off and didn’t. We had no trouble getting back in the kayak. But we scared the leader to death. We also did see some dolphin. We didn't get to see close but it was still great.

We found out about this kayak special through an email that I get. I just got another for some cheaper mini-golf. Maybe, we should do that too. It keeps me active.

February 6, 2014

I remember we had a great time that day.

It was really fun and I felt like I had accomplished something that day. It was the first really strenuous activity I had done since the mastectomy. Even the mishap filled me with hope. I survived it and didn't lose any of my belongings.

I wanted to share a website for those who have just had a mastectomy. There are fashions out there that will be comfortable and make you feel pretty. This one is just an example:

Mastectomy Fashion 

If you are making this journey as I am, may God bless you with His healing touch. I know He loves you.

I also maintain a second blog that keeps me occupied and entertained:

Gammie's Corner

Breast Cancer Angel

Scripture of the Day:

Jeremiah 33:3

          Call on me and I will answer you and show you great and mighty things you do not know.

This angel was drawn by my son, Evan. The original is framed and hanging over our bed. I cross-stitch angels from Lavender and Lace:

This is the Angel of Hope. I have made this one 3 times, once for my sister-in-law and once for my son and once for me. I am now going to cross stitch the Breast Cancer Angel and convert it to embroidery. I always buy a sweatshirt that says how many years I am a survivor. I'm going to make my own 3 year survivor shirt. 

If you are making this journey as I am, may God bless you with His healing touch. I know He loves you.

I also maintain a second blog that keeps me occupied and entertained:
Gammie's Corner